Jiraiya's Scheme
by Bijuu-Jinchuriki
Summary: When Jiraiya's 'research' fails to inspire him, he develops a plan that will easily help him write the next Icha Icha book. All he has to do is send a package and be there to watch the romance ensue. *In Progress*
1. Get the Ball Rolling

**Author Notes: Hey, just wanted to say that this is my first fanfic, but I have read many fanfics and decided to take a crack at it. Also, about the story, it's a little bit of a NaruHarem (no yaoi) but there is only one actual pairing (A Naru pairing, also no yaoi). Guess that's all.**

**Ja ne!**

**Dialogue:**  
"Talking"  
'_Thinking_'

* * *

**Prologue:**  
Walking out of a post office of sorts, an old, white-haired man could be seen. He donned a perverted blush while snickering and ominously rubbing his hands together. This man was, of course, Jiraiya of the Sannin. His upbeat mood had to do with the rather large package he had sent to Tsunade, the Godaime Hokage in office. Jaraiya's scheme was coming together. All he had to do was be there when it happened. Oh, he couldn't wait to get back to Konoha.

* * *

Chapter 1: _Get the Ball Rolling_

"Kakashi-sensei?"

"Yes, Sakura?" Kakashi answered lazily, not looking up from his prized Icha Icha Paradise novel.

"Well uhm..." Sakura started hesitantly,"When will Naruto be back in Konoha?" finished Sakura, holding her blush down to a level only a pervert could detect. If only Sakura knew what was in those damnable, little orange books.

"Does my little Sakura-chan have a crush?" Kakashi teased with a smirk and a blush of his own (albeit a perverted one), both hidden by his mask.

"W-what! Of course not! I was just curious is all." Sakura looked away indignantly, blushing much more furiously than before.

"Well," Kakashi smirked, "our little Naruto-kun will be arriviiiiingg..." Sakura blushed at "kun" and grew more fidgety the longer Kakashi's deliberate pause drew on, both of which were the intended effects of Kakashi.

"...any minute now." Kakashi finished as he felt an immense and familiar chakra nearing Konoha.

Kakashi heard an 'eep' and opened his eyes from the amused smile he'd been wearing to see a frantic Sakura speeding towards the gates.

'_Young love..._' Kakashi sighed which slowly transformed into perverted giggling.

* * *

"I'm going ahead, Ero-sennin, meet you there!" Naruto called back racing towards the grand gates of Konohagakure. Naruto flew past the guards, Izomo and Kotetsu. "Don't worry, Ero-sennin will fill you in!" shouted Naruto, who was headed toward Ichiraku, not looking where he was going.

"Ow!"

"Ehehehe, sorry abou- Sakura-chan!" Sakura was helped up off the ground by the blonde. "Long time-no see, Sakura-chan."

"Yeah..." Sakura trailed off, then steeled her resolve, not wanting to waste her chance like she did with Sasuke. "I've got something to ask you Naruto-kun." '_Kun... where did that come from..._' Naruto thought. "Yeah, Sakura-chan?" urged Naruto. "W-well, would you l-like to go on a, on a d-d-date with m-me?" Sakura stuttered out.

"Yeah, I was just headed to Ichiraku's anyways, we can catch up there!" Naruto beamed at finally getting his date. Sakura was dragged to the ramen stall where she plopped down next to Naruto.

"Jijiii, Ayame-chaaaaaan!" Naruto sang. "Three miso pork ramen, extra-large, and whatever Sakura-chan wants!" Teuchi and Ayame walked out from the back room and beamed at seeing their largest source of income and favorite customer. Well one beamed the other quirked an eyebrow at Sakura. "...a bowl of shrimp ramen..." Sakura said, staring at Naruto dreamily while she practically laid on his shoulder.

"Well if it isn't my big-shot customer. How's life been treatin' ya?" Teuchi questioned. "Well, right now, I'm on a date with Sakura here." Naruto smiled brightly. Ayame felt highly irritated at the way Sakura leaned on and stared at Naruto, even more so considering he only just got back. Teuchi gave a smirk, much to Ayame's chagrin, and started stirring up a boiling pot of freshly made noodles.

"So, Sakura-chan, Ayame-chan, how've you guys been?" asked Naruto. "I learned some new medical jutsu from Tsunade-sama and got promoted to chunin." Sakura stated. "You've always been so smart and talented Sakura," Naruto started while a blushing Sakura beamed and leaned in closer to Naruto and Ayame grit her teeth in annoyance, "Well I'll make chunin faster than anybody, just watch." Naruto said in a victorious manner, like he'd already won.

"So, how about you, Ayame-chan?" Naruto inquired with genuine interest. "Ah same-old, same-old." Ayame said, downtrodden that she'd been outdone by the girl next to Naruto. '_More like on top of..._' Ayame scowled inwardly.

"Well, if 'same-old, same-old' means staying beautiful and a great ramen chef, I'd say life's been good." said a smiling Naruto. Ayame blushed and turned to 'prepare their meals'. She smiled and blushed profusely whiled she finished 'arranging' the toppings and condiments of an already arranged miso ramen. After Ayame's blush faded she slid the bowl in front of Naruto while Teuchi gave Sakura hers.

After eating his like a starving missing-nin, and Sakura hers in a much more polite manner, Sakura got up and hugged Naruto. "Maybe we c-can, do this again... sometime." Sakura asked with a blush. "Hmmm... Your face has been red a lot lately Sakura, are you okay?" Sakura frantically tried searching for an excuse. "Y-yeah, I'm fine, bye Naruto-kun!" finished Sakura quickly. "Okay, see you Sakura-chan."

"So, does Naruto-kun have a girlfriend?" Ayame put on a playful smirk, but genuinely wanted the answer. "I'm not really interested in Sakura-chan like that anymore..." said Naruto thoughtfully. Naruto ordered more ramen while Ayame felt better for a reason she couldn't place.

Once Naruto's ramen was eaten he got up to leave only for Tenten to bump into him as he walked through the flaps of the restaurant. Ayame couldn't make out much of the conversation but she sure caught the end.

"...so it's a date, Naruto-kun!" cried Tenten excitedly as she dragged Naruto to the park. Ayame fumed once again. "He's quite the ladies' man..." Teuchi smirked.

* * *

"Sorry, Tenten, but I have to go to baa-chan's office and report in. She's probably already mad that I skipped out for ramen." Naruto said scratching the back of his head and smiling sheepishly.

"But, we can go on a date sometime right." Tenten almost stated rather than asked. "Yeah. How about... That dango shop Anko-san always goes to!" Naruto suggested. "Hmmm... meet you there at nineteen o' clock?" Tenten continued his train of thought. "I'll be there."

Tenten nodded, satisfied, as she walked away blushing and smiling. Naruto quirked an eyebrow. '_Is there some kind of illness going around..._'

* * *

**Author's Notes: Sorry if this chapter's a bit short, but the coming chapters will be longer. Review, and let me know if you want to see any girls in particular since it is a bit of a harem.  
**

**Ja!**


	2. Romance in the Air

**Author Notes: I'm back with chapter two. I will try to get in a chapter every day, but no promises. Some days I might get in a few, but anyways on to business. I decided to have a section at the beginning of every chapter where I answer / respond to reviews. That's about all for now so,  
**

**Ja ne!**

**Reviews: **

**redwolf23456: Thanks, I'll keep it up!**

**shootingcuz: I probably won't have any girls in the "harem" that are outside of Konoha, but I'll see if I can get Kurama. It's all part of the plot.**

**Falcon800: He'll never learn ;).**

**Guest: Also, no girls outside of Konoha. And it isn't a real harem, as Naruto will only be with one girl in the end. As for what happened that will unfold with the plot.  
**

**On with the story,**

* * *

Chapter 2:_ Romance in the Air_

Tsunade was pinching her nose in a futile attempt to stop the oncoming headache induced by the ridiculously large amount of enemy reinforcements that had just been sent in. Probably the biggest stack of paperwork the Godaime had ever seen. Tsunade reached for her not very well hidden sake in her desk when the office doors slammed open rather violently.

"Obaa-chan!"

The Hokage looked up, at first with an ever increasing amount of ticks at the nickname, until she saw who used it.

"Naruto-kun!" Tsunade all but glomped Naruto, smiling brightly. '_Kun?... Well, she probably just missed me._' Naruto was pulled from his thoughts by a new figure in the room.

"Missed him, Tsunade-hime?" Jiraiya asked with a perverted grin. '_The plan seems to have worked. Even on the resilient Tsunade!_' Jiraiya mused.

"Well, who wouldn't! It's been two and a half years." Tsunade said with a slight tinge of pink adorning her cheeks. "It's good to see you too, obaa-chan." Naruto said with a smile. "Let's get this out of the way, I sta-" "Jiraiya filled me in, you can give your side of the report later." Tsunade interrupted. "So I am free to go?" Naruto asked. "In a hurry to get out of my office?" Tsunade inquired with disappointment. "Well you see, I kind of promised Tenten a date, and it's in an hour." Naruto answered. Tsunade smiled brightly but was jealous on the inside. "Hai, dismissed." said Tsunade, returning to her Hokage chair. '_I already missed the first one, so I should get outside before I miss this chance too._' Jiraiya shunshined out of the office.

"Thanks! And I can take you to lunch tomorrow to catch up, since we can't now." Naruto said. '_A date with Naruto-kun! EEEEEEEEEE..._' Tsunade squealed internally. "Later, Tsunade-chan!" called Naruto, not wanting to upset her with the usual nickname since she just allowed him to leave for his date. Tsunade blushed brightly, not that Naruto was there to see it.

Naruto bolted along the rooftops hurriedly to his apartment. Key already in hand, Naruto landed next to his door and swiftly unlocked the door. He entered and, not taking the time to reminisce, unsealed an orange and black jumpsuit and went to the bathroom. "I hope this shower still works..." Naruto turned the faucet to the shower head on to find it in the same sub-par state he'd left it in.

After a quick shower and a change, Naruto almost quite literally flew out the door and to the Yamanaka flower shop.

He blasted through the door, snatching up a random assortment of flowers along his way to the counter. "Ino, long time-no see, I need you to ring these up!" Naruto yelled frantically, placing the bouquet on the counter. "Naruto-kun! It's been a while. We should catch up over a meal!" Ino suggested. "Ne, no time Ino. I have to get going or Tenten will kill me!" Naruto said. "What's going on?" Ino ask suspiciously while handing him the already payed for bouquet. "I have a date with Tenten!" Naruto called over his back, already sprinting for the door. '_Two can play at that game, Tenten-san._' Ino scowled.

Having left the shop, Naruto ran with chakra-enhanced legs toward the dango restaurant. He came to halt about twenty feet away from the open styled shop. Naruto let out a calming breath and nonchalantly walked into the shop.

"Naruto-kun! You're early." Tenten said from a booth, already waiting with dango. "Yeah. I didn't figure you'd already be here." Naruto walked up to the booth, flowers behind back, and halted in front of Tenten. "Pretty flowers for a pretty lady." Naruto said a line that he didn't think was cheesy at all. Unbeknown to him a perverted hermit using an advanced henge in a booth across the shop facepalmed at the ridiculous attempt at flattery.

Tenten swooned at the compliment and flowers. She blushed heavily seeing many roses, the classic representation of love, and smiled at Naruto. "You really mean it?" Tenten asked. Naruto cocked his head in confusion. "Huh?" came the intelligent reply. "I mean, you actually want to marry me?" a hopeful Tenten asked. Naruto's jaw flopped open, his eyes wide, blushing heavily.

'_He works fast..._' Thought many of the onlookers, including a particular pervert.

Just as Naruto was about to say something Tenten sashayed over and slipped a hand through Naruto's hair onto the back of his head, and pulled him into a long, passionate, searing kiss. There were several loud whoops and dog whistles. '_Seems all of my work might pay off._' Thought the aforementioned henged man who was scribbling down notes madly in a small notebook.

"Go blondie!"

"Nice catch."

"I'll have to see him for advice."

"Kiss him again!"

By this time Naruto's blush went far past Hinata's and he could only do one thing; run.

Naruto dashed off as far as he could; both of his perverted sensei had warned him of the 'dangers' of marriage. Unluckily for Naruto Tenten, in all of her stubbornness, took his running off as a definite 'Yes I would love to marry you Tenten-chan!'

'_Young love._' All of the onlookers thought and sighed, until one sigh turned into a perverted giggle.

* * *

A panting Naruto lay on his bed, deep in his thoughts. '_It's just like Kakashi-sensei and Ero-sennin said. They act all lovey-dovey and nice until they can get you in their clutches. Then, it'll be like they said; Game over._' Naruto thought. A knock sounded at Naruto's door and he saw a girl who resembled Hinata. Only this particular person was a tad shorter and had much less bulky clothes; tight-fitting, dark blue spandex with kunai and shuriken holders, and a short, tan kimono stopping mid-thigh.

The mystery girl blushed deeply before speaking. "I'm Hanabi and-"

_SLAM!_

Hanabi stared wide eyed at the now closed door.

'_I'm not sure what happened while I was gone, but that 'Hanabi's was going all red. Just like Tenten's did before she almost trapped me with that 'marriage' jutsu._' Naruto thought. Kakashi had told Naruto that there was no way out of the 'jutsu'. '_Maybe I should retreat to Baa-chan's_'

Another quick succession of knocking came from the door. '_Oh no..._' Naruto stared at the door, eyes wide in horror. Moments later found Naruto sprinting down the road, having leapt out the window to avoid being tackled by Hanabi, who had broke down the door with a few jyuuken strikes to the hinges.

Naruto slowed down to a walk as he came upon Ichiraku's. "A little ramen break couldn't hurt..." Naruto said to himself.

"Ayame-chan!" called Naruto as he walked under the flaps. Ayame turned to greet the ramen shack's prized customer. "Hey, Naruto-kun," Ayame started, "The usual?" Ayame offered. "Yeah, yeah..." Naruto trailed off narrowing his eyes at Ayame.

"So, Naruto-kun is there... something you want to tell me?" Ayame probed as she started up the ramen. "Not that I can remember." Naruto narrowed his eyes even more in growing suspicion. "At all?" Ayame pushed further. "What are you getting at?" said Naruto, his eyes darting around to find an escape route in case she tried the marriage 'jutsu' on him. "You didn't think your proposal to Tenten-san was worth tell me?" Ayame asked, irritated. "I didn't mean to!" Naruto cried. "I gave her some flowers and she went all crazy with that 'marriage' thing and kissed me!" said an angry Naruto.

"Tenten-san told me you gave her white roses, red roses, and daffodils. That's the traditional bouquet one uses to propose marriage." Ayame narrowed her own eyes at Naruto. "Well how could I know about that jutsu! Not to mention If I _had_ to marry someone it'd probably be you, Ayame." '_Probably the least horrible of all the people to cast the jutsu on me._' Naruto added internally.

Ayame blushed heavily

'_Not her too..._'

"Naruto-kun, you mean..." Ayame blushed even more furiously as she stared wide-eyed at Naruto.

"HELP!" Naruto yelled as he sprinted out of the restaurant.

* * *

**Author Notes: How was that? It was a little longer than the first, let me know if you guys want chapters about this length or longer. Review, let me know what you think. I will have the next chapter out sometime tomorrow, and I might start another fanfic, let me know if you guys would be interested in that.  
**

**Ja!**


End file.
